"anyone know where I might get some routines to deal with parsing the hex file and downloading the code, preferably in C++."

Doubtful. Particulary in the platform that you are asking. Downloading the hex files to an MCU is a job that is best left to the ISP software. The only occassion where you want to develop one such routine in C++ would be when you are developing one such software in that platform. In which case just search for "Intel Hex format" both in this forum ( more specific ) and with Google also. Once the format is known, rest should be easy ?

Raghu