10K + 10uF reset circuit is OK generally and in fact even the 10K may not be needed at times. In fact if you have a "good" regulated supply fed from mains - that is all you need. ( BUT the controller will be happy ;-) if you USE a Reset supervisor like DS1232, DS1233, DS1834 etc )

Not neccessary to pull EA with a high resistance - for external access just connect it to GND via a 1K resistor.

Finally, as has been mentioned, monitor the
/CS and /RD of the RAM while executing a loop to read EXRAM,

MOV DPTR, #EXRAM
LOOP : MOVX A, @DPTR
JMP LOOP

And dont forget to post how the problem was solved finally.

Thanks

Raghu