Anyone who's even once had the typical European version of bread and other baked goods knows that American bread is just an edible napkin, intended to keep one from getting his fingers greasy while eating his bland, tasteless, U.S. version of bologna (called baloney over here).

Likewise, the American version of baked goods is pretty odd. They take what is essentially a tasteless dough, of various consistencies, depending on the end-product, and then fill it with some product, often so sweet that one can only taste the sugar, and call it good.

I ate a "cheese danish" every morning for several months until, one day, someone mentioned that I had gotten the last one, which made them go without, and I was amazed that it was a "cheese danish" since I'd not recognized anything resembling cheese in it. I'd thought it was apricot.

Don't even get me started on the notion of "pie."

RE